ANBU exams
by Mine6Chan
Summary: Shikamaru has been requested to take the ANBU entrance tests. However, there are a few problems with thisand poor Shika just wants to get it over with. Slight shounen ai NejiShika and swearing


Note: I know Torture and Interrogation are part of ANBU put here it is a separate organization. I also know that Asuma wasn't part of T&I but let's just say that he was. Also this is part of a series that I've been thinking about starting "_Shikamaru & ANBU_".

I also don't own Naruto and this has been written only for my own pleasure.

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Shikamaru knew even before he stepped into the building that he was being watched. That he had been watched ever since he'd received that order two days ago. It hadn't come as a surprise, really. It was the natural flow of things. He just wished that he didn't have to go through this since he already knew the outcome.

He'd been called in by the Hokage and she'd told him that there was nothing she could do but that it was only going to take two or three hours of his time. But for Shikamaru that meant two or three hours from his work that was going to have to be compensated by taking two or three hours away from his sleeping time, and for Nara Shikamaru there were few things worse than that.

The order he'd been given was to take the ANBU test, the council as well as the head captain had 'requested' that he take it. It was no small secret that the ANBU, Intelligence, Torture and Interrogation and others wanted Nara Shikamaru on their team. What was a secret, however, was that Shikamaru was part of the same team as Kotetsu, Izumo and Iruka called _Kaze,_ whom worked off the record for the Hokage and the Hokage only. That was the reason the four of them were still only chunin and worked most of the time behind desks.

All Shikamaru had to do was fail the entrance tests. Even though it was obvious that he was more than qualified to be part of ANBU, passing the tests or not, _when_ he failed them than the Hokage could and _would_ deny him.

It was the first time Shikamaru had ever entered the ANBU headquarters, even though he had always known exactly where it was located. The changes that occurred the moment the door closed behind him were, however, surprising. From the outside it looked like any other apartment complex, absolutely nothing out of the ordinary, but inside it was a whole different story. The entrance was huge, running through all the six supposed floors of the building. It looked rather like the library in the Hokage building, but instead of shelves there were doors, with staircases running along the floors, as well as beams that allowed ANBU to run from one side of the building to the other.

And it was full of ANBU!

Shikamaru had seen an entire ANBU team before, even a group of 20 ANBU but this could not even begin to compare. And it was painstakingly obvious how much he did not belong there, a black spot on a white clean sheet of paper. Things weren't made better by the fact that the moment he'd put a foot inside the building that everyone stopped to watch him. He let out a sigh, clutching the papers in his hand harder, and moved forward towards the desk aware of all the eyes following his every move.

"Saa, I'm here…" Shikamaru started reluctantly.

"To take the entrance tests. Yes, we know Nara-san. We've been waiting. Please take a seat and your examiner will be here soon." said the receptionist.

Shikamaru stared at the _ANBU_ receptionist for a second longer before letting out another breath and took a seat. He pulled out the 'request' from his papers, graded tests and mission reports, and looked it over again.

_Requested my ass. __Mendokusena… and I finally had some time off from Hogake-sama's missions. _

Shikamaru was startled out of his thoughts by an ANBU holding out a cup of his favorite green tea for him. The chunin blinked, stared at the cup then at the ANBU and then back to the cup before taking it.

"Aa, thank you."

The ANBU smiled, or Shikamaru guessed he was smiling by the U shape of his eyes, and said: "You're welcome, Nara-san."

Shikamaru was grateful for the gesture which actually helped him relax some and smiled softly as he breathed in the steam from the tea.

_That was Cat. Neji's here and watching. I wonder if he actually wants me to __join. He was out on a mission so I didn't have the chance to tell him but it's obvious he'd know. _

"OI!! Nara Shikamaru!!"

Shikamaru was glad he was a bit more relaxed or he would have spilt hot tea all over himself as the entrance doors burst open and in stormed Morino Ibiki-san with a team of what appeared to be shinobi taken straight out of a nightmare. He wondered if he was going to get any rest today as the bear like man stormed straight up to him yelling the entire time.

"What the hell are you doing here!?! Joining ANBU??!! I'm not going to let you go to waste here!!" Morino Ibiki was an intimidating man, the scars just made him look all the more intimidating and surrounded by men as big and terrifying as him the reactions from the ANBU were understandable. Especially since he came for Nara Shikamaru, someone ANBU hoped would soon be on their team.

Shikamaru for one wondered if perhaps he had been caught up in some weird tv-drama. Here he was sitting in ANBU headquarters with a cup of his favorite tea, and in front of him stood the head of Torture and Interrogation with four of his men facing an ANBU captain and his team whom had seemingly appeared from nowhere to place themselves in front of him. Shikamaru looked up and saw that every ANBU in the building were focused on them and noticed that a lot of them had their hands on their weapons.

Shikamaru could only catch glimpses of the ANBU captain but knew who it was and recognized the two ANBU standing directly in front of him.

_Cat and Bear. And that's Rat and __ANBU captain Dog two beams directly above Ibiki-san. Wolf is by the entrance. Ibiki-san is either truly fearless or insane. …Judging from the reports I've read I'd say he's insane. A genius really, but insane. Or maybe they're the ones insane, I wouldn't want to take him on even if he were half dead and I'd suddenly gained godly powers. _

"Nara-san has come here of his own will to take the entrance tests. You have no right to stop him and no right to be here little less with a team of your own, Ibiki-san. I suggest you leave. _Now_." ANBU captain Ferret spoke.

"Get out of my way, kid. I ain't here to speak to you." Ibiki said as he took another step forward but was once again stopped by Ferret moving in front of him. Ibiki smirked at him; he'd been hoping the kid would do that.

ANBU and T&I had never seen eye to eye, and though it wasn't often they fought over recruits, when they did it was almost a full out war. The last person before Shikamaru to have been sought after by both teams had been Sarutobi Asuma with T&I winning.

_I should do something before __heads start flying. _

Shikamaru placed his tea and papers on the seat next to his and moved past Beaver and Cat. "Saa, Ibiki-san, the examiner hasn't showed up yet so what is it you want to talk about?"

Shikamaru noticed, but ignored, that as he passed by Ferret that the ANBU captain almost reached out to grasp his arm. He stood instead in front of Morino Ibiki, who was almost a head taller and twice as big, with Ferret behind him and smiled his lazy smile at the head of T&I. Luckily, Ibiki's attention now shifted from the ANBU captain to the chunin.

"I've been trying to get you on T&I for almost a fucking year, kid, and suddenly you decide to join ANBU? Bullshit! I know the bitches don't play nice but you ain't got to worry about them. They're pussies." Ibiki spoke as if he wasn't surrounded by almost a hundred ANBU. This was suicide and the T&I agents standing behind Ibiki hadn't dropped their stance since they got in, fully prepared for an attack.

"Ma, Ibiki-san, I'm just here for the entrance tests. If I join or not is up to Hokage-sama." Shikamaru said still with a lazy soft smile.

Many of the ANBU and the shinobi of T&I were impressed by Nara Shikamaru's relaxed and casual posture in front the insane Morino Ibiki and could see why the other team and their own wanted him. What they didn't know however was that Shikamaru was as alert as he would be out on a 'request' by the Hokage. He knew Ibiki-san, knew how the man worked and knew that when there was something Morino Ibiki wanted he'd usually got it using any and all means possible, and even some impossible ones. He also knew that Morino Ibiki liked him, saw a lot of potential and possibly an heir in him, and that he also saw something of himself in Shikamaru.

_You know what I mean, Ibiki-san. I don't want to join ANBU, so don't worry.__ I'm not going to either. Just please leave. I'm sure I won't have to put on an effort to fail at the tests with all this tension practically destroying my nerves. _

Ibiki looked at the kid in front of him. Nara Shikamaru had without a doubt the most brilliant mind he'd ever seen. With the right training there wouldn't be anything that he wouldn't be able to do. That's why he wanted him, because he knew that ANBU would break him. Sooner or later they always broke. Some of them recuperated like Hatake Kakashi and Shiranui Genma, even if they never returned to their original selves, but some of them remained broken forever, like Uchiha Itachi. Ibiki didn't want this to happen to Shikamaru and he knew that Shikamaru didn't want this either. He understood that. He understood that Shikamaru was telling him to talk to the Hokage to get him out of and away from ANBU, and that was what he was going to do.

"Come by my office later kid." Ibiki spoke and ruffled the shorter man's hair before turning around and storming out of the ANBU HQ.

Shikamaru was left standing alone as the ANBU returned to their business after the T&I had left. A hand was placed on his shoulder and Shikamaru turned to look at Ferret. There was warmth in his eyes and Shikamaru offered a soft smile, there was nervousness behind it which the ANBU captain caught and squeezed Shikamaru's shoulder before he reluctantly let go and walked away. Shikamaru stretched and just managed to pick up his tea and papers again before the examiner appeared.

"Nara-san, please, follow me." The ANBU was a young woman judging from her built, which was surprising, and Shikamaru thought at first that perhaps she was only an escort. He quickly changed his mind, though, and confirmed that this was the examiner. She was just not as young as she appeared and not merely an examiner.

She showed him up a flight of stairs and through a door where only the first of many tests was going to take place during the next couple of hours.

"Let me take those for you, Nara-san." The ANBU offered, mentioning towards the papers and tea cup in his hands.

Shikamaru handed them to her. "Thank you, ANBU-sama."

There was a flash of something that passed through the ANBU's eyes at the title, but it disappeared as quickly as it had appeared and she made no other mention of further thoughts.

Almost three hours later, a bruised and exhausted Shikamaru was recovering in the same room he had first been led into. He was trying to catch his breath, sitting on the ground beside his examiner who had followed him through all the tests. She offered him a bottle of water and a towel. "How are you feeling?"

"Tired,… and sore." Shikamaru was in no way in bad condition. It was just that he had been made to run and fight for his life for the past two hours, and he had been alone against an opponent always consisting of ten no matter how many of them he defeated.

"You did good… for a chunin." The ANBU told him and Shikamaru looked up at her. He could tell she was smiling and teasing him. He could also tell that she was disappointed. He smiled back. She held out her hand to him and helped him up on his feet. "When you feel ready head back down to the reception, I'll bring you your papers from before."

Shikamaru nodded at her and took a couple of minutes to calm down further before leaving the room. The receptionist, not the same one from earlier, greeted him and asked him how it went. They didn't get to chat much more before the examiner appeared and handed him his papers. Shikamaru looked through them and pulled out two sheets of papers, graded tests from two pupils in his class, and handed them to her.

"They're doing well, ANBU-sama. They're just bad at following orders and rules, but so are all children." He smiled at her, bowed and left. Leaving behind him several stunned ANBU and a very surprised ANBU head captain with the tests of her grandchildren in her hand.

The tests were over. They hadn't told him but he knew that he had failed them. Tomorrow he would be summoned to Hokage-sama's office and told that 'unfortunately you don't qualify for ANBU'. His Hokage was going to tell him that it was a pity with a look on her face that told him she wasn't sorry at all and then hand him a bunch of papers that had to be looked through. But before tomorrow came he had to drop off the papers in his hand at the academy and then pass by Ibiki's office. If he didn't the terrifying man would appear in his classroom tomorrow and cause terror amongst the kids. Shikamaru was having enough trouble as it was with them, and prepared himself for yet another exhausting encounter.

_I hope Neji'll__ be home 'cause today just sucked. I'm hungry, tired and hurting. I don't think he'll mind a hot bath, take out, and bed early. _

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I finished!!!!!! WA!!!!!!! It's been so long since I've been able to write anything!!!!!!! Usually I have the beginning of a story and start but that's it. Now I've actually written something from start to finish =)

So this is the second story in my "Shikamaru & ANBU" series. Might add a little NejiShika love in a second chapter later on.

If you haven't read the first one it's called "ANBUnurses" but you don't have to read it to get this one or even read it first.

Thank you for reading this, and if you review I thank you for that as well!! THANK YOU!!! I hope you enjoyed it. =)


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